People came from near and far. College friends, touring friends, fans, kids’ teachers, their school band members and theatre buddies, old girlfriends, coaches, bosses, partners. There were Catholic nuns, 12 priests and Christian ministers. There were believers and non believers and musicians and artists, healers and drinking buddies. There were neighbors… There was family. Brothers and sisters and parents and sons and cousins and uncles and aunts and even distant cousins who had never met each other before. There were people from Croatia and Bosnia and Ghana and Kenya and South Korea and Canada and Mexico… all together – Humans of Earth.
They all came because they loved Matthew and were so loved by him.
And I️ could see Matthew smiling… as we cried, sighed, consoled each other, and danced, raised our glasses and gave thanks for the great human of the Earth that he was.
Now everyone has gone back to their homes. The house is quiet.
And there are already a hundred moments in which I️ miss him… in which I️ know not to get stuck in grief but go on breath by breath, one step at a time, wrapped in love and armed with gratitude.
I had arranged for a small bunch of white roses, white daisies and English ivy to be placed on the top of the casket – the same flowers we had on our wedding day. I sang “Love Lives On” for him at the Funeral Mass… And because I knew that he prefers a loud, fun and upbeat songs, I also sang “Alleluia”… It was only because I knew his spirit was right there with me that I was able to sing…